Matt Weinstock

Feb. 28, 1958

There’s a widespread belief among cynics that civilization hangs by a
gossamer thread and if it ever falls it will be because of a trivial
miscue somewhere, not, as others think, from a covey of guided missiles.

This is to report another near miss.

It has to do with the printed cards sent residents of North Hollywood
giving the year’s dates for the collection of noncombustible rubbish by
the city bureau of sanitation.

There it is, unmistakably printed on the cards, Feb. 29–tomorrow.

NOW, IF you’re not sure, a quick look at the calendar will reveal there is no Feb. 29. Not this year, anyway.

Clearly, somewhere around City Hall there lurks a printer who doesn’t
trust calendars, almanacs, soothsayers or North Hollywood. Or perhaps
he has been disappointed in love and disapproves of leap year sneaking
up on innocent people every four years.

However, he played it safe. He made it Feb. 29-March 1.

Hugh G. Kelley Sr. of North Hollywood, who was momentarily shaken by
the date on his card, would like the bureau of sanitation to know that
he is putting out his trash March 1, not. Feb. 29.

likes to create consternation in crowded elevators is at it again. He
remarked casually to a companion in a Spring Street lift, "I was
chatting with a lady wino of my acquaintance–oh never mind, I’ll tell
you about it later."

THE TWO-HORSE parlay of the year was perpetrated last Friday.

Naturally, the lucky guy insists on anonymity because of snooping revenuers.



He gave $10 to a friend who was going to Santa Anita and told him to
put it on the nose of Wish U Well in the second race and parlay the
winnings, if any, to Money Maker in the fourth.

Both won. Wish U Well paying $110.50 and Money Maker $54.10–returning more than $14,000.

But let all horse players offer a moment of silence for the resolution
of the proxy bettor in putting the $552.50 he collected on the first
horse on the second, a 26-1 shot. Chances are if the winner had been
there he’d have let it go at that or blown it on some favorite.

the same for Edward D. Mitchell, 68, L.A. insurance executive, since he
received a National Urban League award for his policy of hiring persons
regardless of race.

The story went out on AP and Mitchell has been receiving a deluge of
mail from all over asking for money, guidance and, in one instance, if
he would finance a divorce.

The topper came the other day from a man who wished to become his chauffeur–as soon as he got out of prison in Oklahoma.

Wilshire district housewife engaged a new cleaning lady who said her
name was Patience, although it didn’t sound like that when she said it.
The housewife asked her to spell it and she did: P-a-s-h-i-o-n …
Recommended reading: Clifton Fadiman’s essay in Holiday on writers. It
includes this provocative sentence: "For most men life is a search for
the proper manila folder in which to get themselves filed" … When
Beverly Hills High School students who are going steady break up they
say they’re "getting a divorce" … Walter Winchell inquired in print
if the LAPD intelligence bureau hasn’t the lowdown on the Marie
McDonald kidnapping and if it doesn’t involve a former Detroit hoodlum
now in legitimate business. Hmmmm … That pretty young woman you see
at Union Station guiding the confused is Mabel Sue Richardson. Her
title: passenger director.


About lmharnisch

I am retired from the Los Angeles Times
This entry was posted in Columnists, Matt Weinstock and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply. Note: Your IP is logged with your comment so a fake name and email address are useless.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s