What Goes Up…

For some
reason, perhaps a power failure, all four elevators in the 12-story
Equitable Building at Hollywood Blvd. and Vine St. Stopped between
floors Monday and remained stalled about an hour.

The remarkable
thing was that there were no passengers in any of the cars, only the
girl operators, who, according to an observer, remained calm and
patient. After all, what else could they do?

And so the
questions is, on what did these four spirited young ladies meditate
during this lost hour? On the ups and downs of life? On the ultimate
outcome of man's fight against machinery? On what they would have for
dinner?

Apparently not. One of them said later. "I just wondered when the heck I was going to get out of there."

AS ANY DOTING grandfather,
publicist Jerry Hoffman was eager to see his granddaughter Lisa, 3, on
a morning TV program which features birthday observances. However, no
set was available near his office, so shortly before 10 a.m. he went
into a nearby bar, ordered a drink he didn't want and asked, "Would you
mind turning on TV?"

"What show?" the bartender asked.

"Chucko the Clown," Jerry replied. The bartender winced all the way up his ears.

::

SPRING PREENING
In spring a woman's fancy turns
To summer styles they're showing
And how to cover up the hips
She's been all winter growing.
-PEARL ROWE

::

LITERARY researchers
are continually turning up new stuff about famous authors, and now Lou
Huston of North Hollywood claims to have uncovered a hither to unknown
anecdote about Henry James.

For weeks James tried to find a name
for a new novel, but none satisfied him. In desperation he consulted
his brother, the noted psychologist William James. William made several
suggestions, but Henry irritably rejected them. Finally William said,
"Henry, you have let this problem unnerve you. Look at you! You're
positively shaggy. Forget the book a while and tidy up."

Taking
his brother's advice, Henry went to a barbershop and sat on a bench
next to a guard from the nearby penitentiary. Lost in reverie, the
novelist heard the barber call "Next!" and leaped to his feet. The
barber pointed to the prison guard and said, "I'm sorry, Mr.James, but
this man is ahead of you. It's the turn of the screw."

Elated, the famous writer ran out of the shop and dashed to his publisher and gasped out the title of his new novel.

::

EAVESDROPPINGS —
A lady who maintains a crowded schedule of meetings and luncheons
exclaimed to a friend, "You know, I'm so busy I never have time to
enjoy myself any more." Rather profound … And a man known as The
Squire, reflecting on his misspent life, got off this one: "I am a man
of many talents, none of which has ever brought in a nickel."

::

IF HE CAN only
figure out a suitable melody, Bill Bates, Laurel Canyon lyricist,
thinks he has a hit torch tune. The title: "Is It Better to Be Wanted
by the FBI Than Not to Be Wanted at All?"

::

ANYONE ELSE
notice that in "Cheyenne" Tuesday, when a boy had to choose between his
Indian mother and the white woman who had raised him and he turned to
Ty Hardin for guidance, Ty said, "That's something you'll have to
decide for yourself." Almost turned a grippingdraymah of the Old West into a cigarette commercial.

::

Miscellany — One night recently R.K. Llyde
and his wife went to the Baldwin Theater and shortly after returning
home received a call informing him his wallet containing about $250 had
been found by an usher, AbeZide. Lloyde hadn't missed it until the call. And so, a typographical posy to Zide
, who refused a reward but accepted $15 for college expenses … A
young man of about 22 was marching solemnly on Hill St. near 5th with a large cardboard placard on his chest stating "I'm a good boy. Hire me."